Truth is: I underestimated it – the road to recovery. My face may be healed but mentally I’m not in the same state of mind as I used to be before I got abused. Why is it so hard to come back on track again?
–It’s now one month and a half ago since it happened. I haven’t been updating in a long time because I needed the time to heal. Two weeks ago I started posting again – with the intention to post every single day again about my life and my obsession for fashion and beauty. I’ve been wanting to blog for so long when I wasn’t able to because of my injuries, now that I can – why can’t I give my full 100%?
Not only do I experience this with blogging – I also experience it in my daily life: for example I never wear make-up anymore and my outfits are mostly all about comfort. I do not neglect myself, absolutely not – but it’s weird hearing that from a girl that loves fashion and beauty. Believe me when I say that I really want to – because I love doing it, doing my make-up and blog everyday but it’s as if I don’t have the energy to do it.
Unwittingly I’m suffering from it, what happened. I realize that I probably need to talk with someone – I find it hard talking about it here too since it is a sensitive subject that most people don’t talk about. We mostly act like we’re okay, when we bump into someone we always ask: “How are you?” and well, 99% will say: “I’m good”. I’m probably the best when it comes to this, I’m a very good listener but when I have to talk about my own feelings I’ll mostly tell you (and myself) that I’m good while I’m not. I know I’m not the only one, I know most people are dealing with the same thing – despite the fact that I find it so hard to write this down, I wanna take you with me on my road to recovery. Maybe you’re going through the same, maybe it can be helpful – I don’t know but I wanna use my website to share, to help. We can only evolve when we overcome our fears and really deal with our problems.